ME: Are you ready for...FAMILY VACATION??
Oliver: Claps hands, nods yes with a big smile.
ME: Hey Oliver...we are going to the BEACH for FAMILY VACATION!!!
Are you excited???
Oliver: Claps hands, nods yes with a big smile.
As soon as we arrived to Monterey, I got Oliver dressed for the beach. The first thing we did at the beach was show him the Ocean. As we approached it...he clung tighter and turned his head away from it.
ME: Oliver, don't you like the Ocean?
Oliver: Shakes his head NO!
ME: Oliver, don't you like the beach?
Oliver: Shakes his head NO!
Even though we brought his shovel & pail (and practiced digging in dirt at home for weeks), he would not sit in the sand and play. He would not make a sand castle. He held on to us as tight as he could and cried if we tried to put him down in the sand. Sand touched his toe and he was horrified!When I tried to get him pumped for the Aquarium...he looked untrusting of my enthusiasm. Now whenever I asked him if he was having fun on family vacation, he would just shudder and shake his head NO!
Me: Oliver do you like the Aquarium?
Oliver: Shakes his head NO.
We had a lovely dinner in Monterey. I surprised Jon and wore a dress he sewed for me in 1997!
Jon also booked us a theme room at the The Madonna Inn. We got "The Old Mill." It was gaudy and dated and absolutely PERFECT! Pictures don't do it justice. The entire hotel was cotton candy pink. The gift shop, restaurants & bar were pink.
There is a working water mill fountain on the wall & animatronic mill people above our bed.
Oh, and the toilet seat was heated!
Oliver & I standing in front of our Old Mill mural.
Me: Oliver, do you like staying at the Madonna Inn on family vacation?
Oliver: Shudders, and shakes his head NO.
It's sad the only picture of us together in our room is blurry. I still can't believe we've been married for 10 years. Where does the time go?
The room came with two pink robes. I fantasied I would get a picture of each of us in our robe. Jon did not help me fulfill this fantasy.
People just don't decorate their gardens with lesbian-threesome sculpture anymore!
Jon booked an hour and a half tour of Hearst Castle. 
Oliver did really good the first 50 minutes.
Then the tour guide "suggested" that we take him to the children's play room to help him "get the ants out of his pants". She clearly did not understand that the ants have made his pants their PERMANENT RESIDENCE. I was so bummed, but then a man from another tour got really sick, and they kicked Jon & Oliver out of the playroom to accommodate him. Yay for sick people! So, we did get to finish the tour together. We had a great time.
Me: Oliver, what did you think of the Hearst Castle?
Oliver: Shudders.
Me: Oliver did you like our family vacation?
Oliver: Shakes his head NO and trembles in fear.
